Sunday, January 29, 2012

Walking This Waking World

Most people walk this waking world in blind ambivalence toward all things, chained to deeply embedded programs and patterns instilled from birth (perhaps even before) and ever onward to the grave. No appreciation for either life or death, they fumble through a staid existence of self-delusion, ego-centricity, and easily accepted doldrums and routine. An easier road, to be sure. Living to be told what to do, how to love, where to spend their filthy money. No chances taken, very little experience to be had. They sink into depression, deceive themselves into believing it to be "happiness". They deny the "soul" and march march march to climb ladders of social constructs without ever being aware (or ever even wanting) more, without ever wanting or even feeling the need to wake up, understand, or truly grow in the most basic sense of the word. Playing it safe, staying in the well lit neighborhoods of the mind, and pretending that somewhere in those darkest and most ignored regions of the psyche that there is no killer waiting in the shadows, no creatures of night just beyond the vision of the minds eye. They learn life from books and movies, parading a faux-intelligencia of judgement and holier than thou superiority without really the slightest idea or bloody painful true life experience. They believe monsters do not exist, take metaphor for literal meaning, and play every move they make in paramount safety of being.

Then there are those who know better, who have seen the daarkest regions of the soul of man, of self. They know all too well what lurks just out of view, and that monsters really do exist. Those who process suffering into strength, and questions into answers, yet are wise enough to know that answers only lead to more questions. That life is not about jobs and security, money and racing to see who is really on top, but truly living in rare moments of total beauty and complete ugliness, and finally having a deep and profound respect for both, as well as the so very thin line that separates the two. Life and death, genius and madness, beauty and atrocity . . . not a single one of those things can be had without the other.

Sometimes there really is no grey area, only black and white. Of course, no one thing is ever so completely cut and dried as such, and not all humans have the constitution or capacity, the will, desire, drive, or even care to try and see, comprehend, or understand any of this. Some people it kills outright, some it destroys in other ways. And some take the pain and consume it, dissect it, learn it and push their minds and souls ever further to deeper places most would never want to go. They grow, "wake up" a bit as it were. Not all of it has to be negative, and it really is only the fool who translates it exclusively as such. From the depths of deepest darkness can come the most astonishing of lights.

Which side of the line do YOU walk on?

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